Integrity

I'm usually thinking about free will, especially when it comes up at Men's Group or with my church friends. Just the other day the same person said, "Hey, if you're gay, you're gay. You can't help it," then later, "Well, you do choose what you do with your body." This guy's main point is, "There's a purpose for every person no matter what circumstance they're born into."

I used to think it doesn't matter at all whether you believe everything is already determined or whether you believe in free will.

Then, over a year ago another minister told me, "It doesn't matter what you believe on this subject . . . [etc.]"

I thought, "Wait a minute; it probably does matter," because I was born antagonistic. (I also was told, "Don't read the Old Testament," by someone I highly respect. So, I started reading the Old Testament more and eventually took 12 hours of graduate level Biblical Hebrew.)

Since last year when I was told it doesn't matter, the question has really interested me and I've discussed it with several other people online and in person who are interested in it as well, although it's almost always them who brings it up. Recently, the movie 21 Grams brought this question into focus. Interestingly, the movie was recommended by an atheist friend of mine.

I believe, though, that another question is much more significant than this complex one of What is determined in life and what is up for grabs?

How can I live in integrity?

I think that's THE question. You can use your answer to the question of whether you believe everything is determined or whether everything is open either to seek integrity or to avoid it.

Seek integrity . . . even if you think it doesn't matter.

Truth Ironically

We drove into Port Macquarie for the night on our way up to Brisbane and I experienced a three-pronged irony:

A tasteful sign listed the praiseworthy attributes of the city, namely, IDEAL CLIMATE.

Seconds later we passed huge sign on which was written in gigantic letters, SEVERE WATER RATIONS--HIGH ALERT!

A moment later I realized that it was RAINING RATHER STEADILY. I laughed out loud.

I realize that truth can be complex. In fact, it's impossible to know all the facts about anything and even the facts we know might seem at times in conflict with the others. How can an ideal climate have both severe water rations and what seems like plenty of rain?

I'm reminded of the mixed messages Christians often send non-Christians. We say, "Christianity is the best climate in the world." Other people think, Well, of course, you think that. It helps you cope with the hard things in life to think that you live in the best religion already and don't have to search. But there are varieties in any religion. There's not just the religion-makes-me-feel-good-in-the-face-of-death option. In the same way, I can't just dismiss religion or God just because hundreds of priests molested boys or because numerous church organizations oppressed the weak. I accept mango as a delicious food even though I discard the seed and skin. I also accept Christ and follow him even though many people associated with him inspire me to anger or apathy.

Some of us Christian types say God provides for our needs, but our lives are often like a giant billboard exclaiming, YOU GOTTA HORDE THINGS AND PUT YOUR ENEMIES DOWN TO STAY ON TOP!

Meanwhile, God's sun shines and his rain falls on both the just and the unjust.

God doesn't play favorites. I might make all kinds of claims about how good I am and how bad others are, but--and this applies to both Christians and non-Christians--my perception of Reality is often poor and yet I live in dependence upon other people whether friends or enemies and on God whether I believe God to be the Author of Reality or not. Some things are true despite my lack of comprehension. In fact, perhaps it's the irony that best bears witness to the truth.